This Week… Addicted To Discogs? Iain Duncan Smith Can Help
“Out there, these boys particularly, when left without the concept of what marriage and commitment is about will find the alternative on the internet." – Iain Duncan Smith
"The internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom." – Jon Stewart
"The perils of duck hunting are great – especially for the duck." – Walter Cronkite
Well, well, well… Mother Theresa looks to be in a bit of a pickle doesn't she? If only she had a prayer…. All leadership jokes aside, the biggest story to emerge from the Conservative party conference wasn't the ego of bumbling Boris but the insane chatter of Iain Duncan Smith. Speaking at a fringe event he felt that the most pressing issue to discuss in 21st century politics was 'unmarried men' who he described as 'a problem to society'. We here at Ransom Note aren't sure why to be honest? None of us are married and we aren't all layabouts who spend all day on the internet looking at funny pictures and debating who has a better kick drum…. In all seriousness though, in an era of Brexit, nuclear bombs and child poverty you want to bang on about 'tieing the knot'….
Anyway, have you ever heard of the phrase "shitting rainbows"? Well this is nothing like that but a bloke kept a kilo of gold up his bum and got caught. I mean, we've all been there…
Now, time for some important news. Burial released some new music this week and rumour has it that his identity has finally been rumbled….
Okay, okay, okay. That was a joke but do you want to know what definitely isn't a joke. This. THIS IS NOT A JOKE. Open your calendar right now and book that date off immediately. This is like the royal wedding times infinity. Like Blade Runner on speed. Like Gary Lineker taking a shit. We all love Kronenbourg, don't we Eric?
Finally, Axl Rose is a great guy. Now he looks like Benny Hill. What could be more great? GREAT.