Riva Starr

Riva Starrs been getting loads of plaudits and loads of gigs this year, and has produced some good wonky house music up til the moment when he decided to release this stinking old dog of a track. I dunno if it’s just me but this sounds like the last ten years of dance music hasn’t happened. As a result this is probably best listened to in Ibiza, in 1998, whilst trying to chew some life into Brandon Blocks flaccid little willy, as he necks Mitsubishis made from rat poison and Cillit Bang, and you both wonder mournfully how and why your life ended up being soundtracked by camp comedy house written for dullards and the criminally stupid. Sorry.

Ian Mcquaid