If you don't know who Joe Europe is by now then you clearly don't have enough Audio Love in your life. You might not know that he's also a dab hand at putting together a record and he's got a new one just out - rather a convenient time for him to put together a mix for us don't you think? Regardless, our very own Mr E is bringing more than 2 hours of sounds to your ears so that you could travel all the way from London Euston to Liverpool Lime Street in the time that it takes this mix to send you into space. Fact. Maybe. Anyway, to accompany this mighty fine mix he's also answered a batch of nonsense questions. And a few about the mix itself, because sometimes we do need to be a bit professional.
Have you ever hit anyone with a slipper?
I’ve threatened it enough times. Maybe today will be the day.
Should employers be allowed to keep their staff in dungeons?
Sometimes it’s justified. Sometimes it’s the only way forward. It would only be for their benefit, you understand.
Have you ever actually been to Europe? Like, proper Europe?
I’ve read about it. Well I skim read the wiki page shortly before adopting the pseudonym. Seemed like a cool place so I went with it.
I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 100, discuss the probability that it's a prime number.
No. (Spoilsport - C)
What's your favourite Wetherspoons and why?
Canterbury. Beyond doubt. I hate Canterbury but if you spend Christmas day babysitting two elderly relatives in ‘Spoons whilst drinking overproof rum with your brother in law then this is clearly a special place.
Who is your favourite member of the Ransom Note staff and why isn't it Wil?
Wil is so last year. I mean he used to be enjoyable on an ironic “I wouldn’t touch him with yours but he’s kind of cute” way but even that wore off pretty quickly. Until recently everyone was raving about Ian, having completely overlooked Ciaran but even his tough guy image, pink dreads and inexplicable hatred of Belgium has now grown tiresome and irritating. I think this new guy Sebastian Bellamy seems to be the one for me. I mean; those teeth! That hair!!
What's the difference between a wav and an mp3?
MP3. Almost sounds like empathy doesn’t it? Wav – that almost sounds like chav. But the opposite is true. Go figure.
How many more double entendres can we make out of the name 'Audio Love'? What would be your ideal 'ooh matron' phrasing?
I’m not intelligent enough to get double entendres.
Where's Shropshire? Is it in Wales?
It’s an eternal thought in the mind of God. No, that was Rome. At the end of the M54 mate.
Hang on, why are we interviewing you again?
Because I have a record out. It’s great and you begged me to do this. Do you want me to go get the naughty slipper?
Enough of my rubbish, let's talk mix...
Where was the mix recorded?
My studio/spare room.
What would be the ideal setting to listen to the mix?
Well it’s quite long so would be perfect for a train. Maybe on your way to go raving with some mates you haven’t seen in ages. It starts slow but the more you drink your train booze the tempo picks up and by the time you get off the train you’re ready to neck a load of garys and reach for the stars.
What should we be wearing?
Top hat, pink gas mask, either a chain mail apron or a paisley print toga, leggings with a map of Europe (Den Hague over the crotch) and diving flippers. You know, just something casual like.
What would be your dream setting to record a mix: Location/system/format?
I think I’d have to say 2000 BCE somewhere Shropshire. Maybe Mitchells Fold, which is a stone circle just outside Bishops Castle. The system would be an exquisitely tuned Funktion One set up by Tony Andrews himself and obviously I’d be playing on a beautiful Bozak rotary and the party would be in full flow. The mushrooms are just kicking in and I’m about to play the first Carole King record of the night. The first of many.
Which track in the mix is your current favourite?
So many it’s hard to pick a favourite but the second to last tune by FYI Chris on Rhythm Section is an absolute killer. It’s called Back in the Millennium.
What’s your favourite recorded mix of all time?
This is a tough one. I’m torn between saying the Dave Clarke mix (from Muzik Magazine) that I stole of my brother aged 11 that got me into all this and the Coldcut 70 Minutes of Madness mix which is just incredible. Both hugely influential on me from a young age.
If you could go back to back with any DJ from throughout history, who would it be and why?
This is tricky. I think if I picked a big name that had really inspired me then I’d get too star struck and fuck everything up. I hugely enjoy DJing with my label mate and DJ partner Miles. So I’m going to be soppy and say him. We often get a bit too drunk though.
What was your first DJ set up at home and what is it now?
First – two Gemini Direct Drives and a Gemini Mixer.
Now – two 1210s and a borrowed DJM-300.
What’s more important, the track you start on or the track you end on?
They’re both important. And the ones in the middle.
What were the first and last records you bought?
I’m struggling to remember the first to be honest. I used to steal a lot from my older brother. My early purchases on cassette included Morrison Hotel by the Doors, Kaya by Bob Marley and The Singles Collection by the Cure. This is from when I was around 10. I still love them all.
The most recent one was the FYI Chris one I mentioned earlier at the Peckham Independent Label Fair a couple of weeks back.
If this mix was an edible thing, what would it taste like?
Cadbury’s Dairy Milk. Or a scotch egg.
If it was an animal what would it be?
A hamster wearing a baseball cap.
One record in your collection that is impossible to mix into anything?
'He Touches Me' by Down Under on Fine Tunes. It shouldn’t be hard but for some reason I always seem to fuck it up.
Upcoming in the world of Mr Europe?
I recently had a tune on a wax from the mighty Bokhari records which also had ace tracks from Krill Tipo and Creta Cano. I also have some other records coming up that I can’t yet announce. Other than that writing more music, putting out people’s records on my label Ears Have Eyes and writing about music for you gents (May not be original last word - C).
Anything else we need to discuss?
We’ll discuss the rest in private.
The Bokhari Presents EP featuring Joe Europe's 'Magnon (Acid Dub)' is out now.