This Week… Old People, Breast Feeding And A United Korea
"What do I care if it be the King or the Law that drags me to the guillotine?" – F.R. de Chateaubriand
“Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come" – M. Groening
"You can say anything as long as you put the right emoji next to it" – K. West
"Dancing is one of the best things anyone can do for themselves. And it doesn't cost anything" – F. Knuckles
Old people or breast feeding.
What's the answer?
…TIME'S TICKING SHITBREATH…
Did you get it? It wasn't the easiest of questions.
The answer is David W Griffiths, the independent candidate for Isleworth. If you want to know more… actually, you don't have a choice because I'm going to tell you more.
But there is more, a whole lot more.
It began this week with a leaflet posted through a friend's door this week.
The website Mr Griffiths supplies at the bottom of that leaflet can be found here. I highly recommend you take a proper look, but I'll summarise (and I wish I didn't need to because every letter of every word is gold).
This isn't actually his first flyer to turn heads. This one is:
DON'T LAUGH if you're young. How old do we have to be to laugh, David?
His website is one of the most personally informative you'll find on the www.com. He breaks his persona down into enviably simple chunks, the like of which you find find any other politician doing — except maybe Lord Buckethead. For example, this first section:
Broken down thus.
In 1973 – when I was 13 – I never wore a pair of platform shoes.
I didn’t wear a bin liner or poke a safety pin through my nose in 1977.
I didn’t wear a shell suit in 1988.
I don’t like chocolate.
My favourite music video is Call on Me (Eric Prydz).
I’ve never been into a Starbucks.
I’ve never read a Harry Potter.
I’ve never bought an Apple product.
My second favourite music video is Destination Calabria.
I’ve never used moisturiser.
And I think Mozart was – and still is – shite.
And my favourite band is – still – Yes.
I won't give you infomation on the next section.
It's just a lot of quotes from the likes of Aristotle, Rhetoric, 1403b., Diogenes Laertius, The Lives of Eminent Philosophers, 9, 6., Saddharmapundarīkasūtra [Lotus Sutra], 2.
For the record, it isn't that funny. But here you go.
Remember to vote! R$N don't condone any form of political influence. But I do.
Vote 4 Lord Buckethead.
Look, here's Lord Buckethead at next week's London Film & Comic Con Event, May the 4th, getting a photo with the Sith Lord dressed all sexy like. Mega.
Have you been to Berlin?
Below, a stunt double of the Duchess of Cambridge holding a doll double of little Prince Louis.
It would have been reckless otherwise, right?
- The idea of royalty in 2018 is weird.
- Kanye is irrelevant in 2018.
THOUGHTS OF THE WEEK
- Why are the Tories in power?
- What would happen if Wembley stadium was sold?
- Why are Abba releasing new music?
Look at them all thinking about new music. Calculated.
LET'S ALL GO TO STONEHENGE.
Narrated this video of Nina because I am the voice inside her head pic.twitter.com/CJTJQQe4Hl
— Austin Gebbia (@austin_gebbia) April 26, 2018
Let's finish on an upper. Bold goals for peace, appaza!
Only time will tell…
C U NXT WK. x