Asking For A Friend #11

Whether you've had a particularly testing week or if you've already swanned off to Glastonbury in search of a weekend of music and general debauchery, we've got another batch of questions in from Mitch Davis's wonderful friend to make sure that you've got a smile on your face wherever you are. Let's kick off with something nice and topical based on the image above then…

Is this £600 ticket fake? The security at the gates are saying it is. Asking for a friend at Worthy Farm.

What's a cool word for 'cool' these days? Asking for a friend.

Is it cool to refer to mash as 'pulled potatoes' these days? Asking for a friend.

If you've injected mdma into your eyes, will they stay like this forever? Asking for a friend.

Is it wrong to set up a charity and then keep the money to spend on a fancy holiday? Asking for a friend.

Is it unlawful to throw leftovers out of your window onto the street below? The council are saying it is. Asking for a friend.

If you've just seen yourself on Redtube, how do you get the clip removed? Asking for a friend.

If you've been filmed snorting coke on the tube and it's gone viral, will you get sacked? Asking for a friend.

If you're off to meet Kylie and want to have it off with her, should you wear this little Versace number? Asking for a friend.

If girls laugh when they see your penis, is it because you're funny? Asking for a friend.

Can you die from being too fucking handsome? Asking for a friend.

Are Nigel Farage tattoos still a thing? Asking for a friend.

Hello…is it me you're looking for? Asking for a friend.

Mitch Davis can be found running Numb Magazine among other things.