In what might be the most unpredictable thing we've ever had on R$N (yes, really), we handed one of our very favourite sonic inventors the reigns to let us know how he'd curate Sonar Festival if he had his own way. Yes, we're letting the infamous DJ Detweiler, creator of office favourites such as this, this and this, tell us the festival should be run before he heads there himself. Be warned, you may not be the same by the time you get to the end. We even had the pleasure of meeting the man of many flutes recently too... but that's another story entirely.
One more from Detweiler before he begins;
1. GFOTY B2B Grimes (dj set)
This needs to happen, both GFOTY and Grimes played the best DJ sets ever in the history of Boiler Room and, to celebrate it, they should team up together and headline Sonar, DJing B2B.
2. I am a Raver [Stage!!]
Do you know who DJ Rankin, Gary MCF or DJ Cammy are? I didn't until some years ago. My mates from the UK showed me this a while ago, they are legends of ringtone music from the early days of YouTube and they KILL IT!! After years of jumping from Nokia Xpress Music to a Sony Ericsson Walkman phone and having their tunes smashed on public transport and in parks by teens, they teamed up and started promoting parties in Glasgow. I think Sonar needs a stage for this!! Mp3 128kbs tunes ripped from YouTube, played on a big Funktion One system all night long - just like the party they do in Glasgow.
3. Small But Hard (Takeover)
Needs to happen, noisy-feedback-distortion freaks like Deadfader, DJ Scotch Bonnet (formerly DJ Scotch Egg), DJ Die Soon , C_C and many more. All of them kill on the dancefloor so bad. Please let them curate a takeover!!!
4. The Vengaboys
Yes, why not!!?? If The Chemical Brothers and Skrillex can play at Sonar, we should give Vengaboys a chance!!
5. Crank Sturgeon
I saw him in Berlin a couple of years ago. Would 100% recommend.
6. Company Fuck
My friend Company Fuck MUST PLAY ASAP at Sonar. Have you ever witnessed grindcore karaoke LIVE? Now is the time.
7. Tony Hawk Pro DJ
Whoever Tony Hawk Pro DJ is, they disappeared from the scene after a short period and nobody knows why, has to come back and smash some 900º bangers at Sonar.
Yes, why isn't there karaoke at festivals? Sonar should start doing it. As they are an advanced music festival, I'm sure all festivals will copy them afterwards.
The guy who makes the best (and longest) compilations ever on the internet is called Mabson. In my opinion he should curate a whole stage, I'm pretty sure he would book DJ George Costanza to headline it
Tons of internet users creating loads of small mash-ups as music memes and sharing them via Soundcloud (probably this wont be able to happen for long thanks to new Soundcloud copyright laws - thanks Soundcloud!!) Yeah, some people called it Soundclown, most of the "producers" hate that word, lol... Anyway... It would be funny if Sonar hosted a stage only for Soundclown. My proposal is to do it as a virtual stage via a web URL so everyone on the internet can attend while eating Doritos and drinking Mountain Dew. It would probably mean more people attending this way (more than IRL, haha).
At some point there has to be a reception for the festival with cocktails and popcorn, maybe outside, just before people pass the door. Or maybe inside just after going in. Chin Stroke Records is my label and we should have a whole lounge; my mates DJ Bus Replacement Service, DJ Dadmagnet, Queerhawk, DJ Arman van Hard On and many more would be playing what everyone wants: BANGERS!
14. DJ WARLORD
DJ Warlord asked me for a remix once, it was going to be on a EP. I think it hasn't been released though. WARLORD SEND ME THE STEMS!!!
16. NO SMARTPHONE POLICY
It will be illegal to pass through with a smartphone. Everyone will deposit their smartphones on the door. The organisation will give everyone a watch so people can know what time it is.
17. Steve aoki playing on a dolby surround home speakers at 14:00 on the sun
This will be funny. No cakes, no fireworks, no lights, only a broken, distorted, really small soundsystem and virtual DJ. The capacity of the stage will be 5000 people. Lol.
18. I got this message randomly.
I think a proper stage with this concept would be a nice experiment, innit?
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