Asking For A Friend #85

There is always that one bloke in the pub who thinks out loud. Who asks the questions which pop into his head almost immediately, he has little filter and asks the questions that we all want to know the answers to. His name is Mitch Davis and this is Asking For A Friend.

Can someone call the fucking RSPCA please?
Asking for this cat.

Anyone looking for some hot Valentine's love?
Asking for a friend.

Is this suitable attire for a Valentine's dinner date at Nandos? 
Asking for a friend.

Is this haircut pure sex?
Asking for a friend.

Will this outfit give me the ability to fly away somewhere nicer? 
Asking for a friend.

Does my bum look big in these? 
Asking for a friend.

Where am I?
Asking for a friend.

Anyone want to buy some second hand burger cheese slices? 
Asking for a friend.

If your neighbour is leaving you notes, does she fancy you?
Asking for a friend.

Anyone want to buy a case of artisan slow death in a tin? 
Asking for a friend.

Where can you buy this Donald Trump print from? Would look great in my bedroom.
Asking for a friend.